Our neighbor "Ron" stopped by the other night to chat. Ron is not well-liked in the neighborhood. He is constantly drunk, loud and rude. He joins conversations uninvited and expresses his opinions at top volume. He doesn't know when to leave. He probably urinates in the community swimming pool.
I see the eye rolls and sideways looks directed at him. I can almost hear people thinking, "can't he see he's not wanted?"
Um, yeah. That's the whole point. Ron is collecting evidence to support his Most Negative Thought -- "I'm not wanted."
Whatever you choose to call it, Core Belief, Personal Lie or Most Negative Thought, it runs our lives. We spend huge amounts of time proving it.
Your Most Negative Thought might be something like:
- I'm not good enough
- I'm bad
- I don't belong
- I'm not wanted
- I'm not good enough as a female/male
There are others, but these are the most common.
Humans will do almost anything to avoid change. This is a survival mechanism that has been part of our brains since we lived in caves and threw rocks at our enemies. However, it is often a huge obstacle in our modern desires for health, happiness and spiritual fulfillment.
Let's get back to Ron, obeying the unconscious need to avoid change. If Ron's result in all life situations is "I'm not wanted," then he has successfully dodged change. Things are the same for Ron, and will stay the same as long as he has plenty of evidence to back up his belief.
What is your most negative thought, and how do you perpetuate it? Do you understand that as much as you may dislike this about yourself, you also need it? Can you recognize that feeling of comfort in your body as you run on the treadmill of past thoughts? Do you want to change?
If so, watch for my next post. If you can change your thoughts, you can change your life.